I’ve said it a dozens times right here on this blog - the ethanol craze is mind-numbingly ill-founded and politically driven. Now there’s science (ahhhhh!) to back it up. I don’t read USA Today often, but I was traveling for work last week and lo and behold, the paper served me a fresh batch of “I freakin’ told you so” with my morning coffee. There’s nothing like getting right to the point in an article:

Anything’s better than ethanol blend E85, even ordinary gasoline, a new cost-benefit analysis of alternative fuels by researcher John Graham at the Pardee Rand Graduate School finds.

If that was too cryptic for you, in fewer words the author is saying that ethanol wanks . . . hence the title of the post.

Come on, ethanol can’t suck entirely you say . . .

Graham’s team calculated the individual and societal costs and benefits of conventional gasoline vehicles, gasoline-electric hybrids, high-tech diesels and flex-fuel vehicles burning E85 full time. Conclusion: Unless gasoline prices, averaging $3.10 a gallon now, rise above $4 and average $3.50 or more the next few years, or ethanol prices drop a lot, diesel’s the best overall solution; E85′s the worst.

At least ethanol’s the most efficient solution, right?

Ethanol has less than 70% of the energy of gasoline, so more ethanol in the blend means fewer miles per gallon.

You’re killing me James R. Healey.

Drawbacks outweigh the high marks ethanol gets for adding almost nothing to the cost of a vehicle modified to burn E85 and for energy independence, Graham’s team concluded. Ethanol is made from grain, mainly corn.

And there’s the rub. The United States is hell-bent on making ethanol as inefficiently as possible, which is to make it from plants like corn and hawk it as E85 – our savior! Corn is not cellulosic, meaning it doesn’t hold near the potential energy as do cellulosic sources, like sugarcane, switch grass and other biomass. Since very few cellulosic crops are grown in the U.S., American farmer’s object to using imported sources for fuel, arguing it’s no different than importing oil. If by the same they mean different – you know, because countries that grow cellulosic plants or make cellulosic ethanol usually don’t harbor terrorists and goad us into ridonkulous wars - then I agree wholeheartedly. The good news is that ethanol projects are stalling all over the country. The bad news is that I have little hope that even a Democratic president can save us from this stupidity.