A Life Including Service

Today is one of those days that reinforces why I volunteer and selfishly, the satisfaction I get from doing so. I waver almost daily on how much involvement I want to have in my community. There are days I just want to hole up and not deal with the struggle of trying to make things better. This is America after all. I eat what I kill and if the system is unfair, too bad. Fortunately I don’t rest on that attitude for long. My “whatever” thinking is generally fleeting.  This is America after all. I can make a difference - little ol’ me.

This line of thinking reminds me of an episode of Friends in which Joey and Phoebe are debating whether or not there is such a thing as a selfless good deed. My thought is that there are, but they are fewer and further between than most people would like to believe. I’m fairly certain I’ve never committed a selfless good deed because helping others and volunteering makes me feel good, even when I receive nothing tangible in return, as was the case today. I’m not sure I’d do what I do if I didn’t get something out of it.

This morning was the bimonthly board meeting of an organization with which I’m involved called St. Louis Artworks. I’ve been a board member about a year and a half, and while I haven’t contributed as much as I’d have liked to, I’ve been able to influence the direction of the organization in a positive way . . . at least that’s what I’ve been led to believe. Today’s board meeting was different from most because it was the most connected to the actual inner workings – the employment of youth in artistic disciplines – of the group since I joined the board. After the board meeting the members were given an informal tour of three of the disciplines being taught this summer – ceramics, printmaking and sculpture. Each discipline is staffed with some good kids.

While there are exceptions, most of the students who participate live in the City of St. Louis, are African American and come from low to moderate income households.  A few months ago I had the opportunity to interview these students for admission into the program. Today I got to see those who were selected hard at work. The most amazing part of what I saw this morning is that some of these students are finally in an environment that allows them to thrive, or at least be enlightened to subjects they would never know about were it not for this program. Their minds are opened and hope is permitted to build inside of them.

One such young gentlemen came up to me today and introduced himself the second I walked into the room. He took me on a tour of the room and showed me what his group was working on. He was courteous and professional. This student was one of the more outgoing of the bunch, but for most this is their first job. The interview day I mentioned earlier is often their first exposure to the working world and the intimidation and reservation these kids feel is palpable in the room. I don’t know this particular student’s background but he told me he wanted to go to school to become an architectural engineer. I told him my degree is in engineering and he asked if it was hard. I told him yes but while he seemed slightly dejected he was simultaneously upbeat. He said he was at going to try nonetheless. I told him the best things in life aren’t easy. That little bit of undefinable, immeasurable ambition is fuel to my fire and will keep me going for a little bit longer.

If you long to feel worthy I encourage you to spend some time with those different from you and offer whatever it is you have to offer. Everyone will be better off for it.